How to untie the knot in my heart?

I had lunch and nothing to do in the office. Suddenly got this thought. How to untie the knot in my heart?

I seriously want to know how. I need to throw away the idea of having a baby. I knew it’s giving me a lot of stress and indirectly affecting Jason. To him, he thinks that it’s still early, we’re married for half a yr. I just can’t stand why people get it so easily and I so difficult. I believe it’s stress which make my menses irregular. I need to release it but I don’t know how to. I try to read books, watch dramas to make me forget about it.

But people like to ask me….. Can they just don’t ask me? I hate people asking me “so how, got any news”. Of course I hope got good news. That’s the biggest hope I have now. I will be super happy when the day comes. But when is the day coming?